Random Facebook Posts By: Jesse Abundis

ALL THESE FACEBOOK UPDATES ARE MADE BY ME ( Jesse Abundis ) So here’s what you’re missing out on 😀
 
 
WRITTEN:  Jan 18th
 
I wanna see a Pulp Fiction version with Batman & Superman, they’re riding in the batmobile, then Superman asks Batman ” Do you know what they call a quarter pound with cheese on Krypton?”” What do they call it?” Batman ask.

” Nothing, my whole fucking race is dead!” Then he pulls out kryptonite, breaks it, pulls out his credit card, makes a line, snorts it and dies!

Roll credits, then at the end put a special scene, where Louis Lane wakes up pulls the sheet and finds an OD Superman staring at her crossed eye!

 

WRITTEN: Jan  18

 

MAMA the movie title makes me laugh, I don’t picture a monster in the woods, I picture a big black lady saying ” Oh hell no, nobody takes my creepy little crackers, mama is about to whoop someones ass.”

 

 

WRITTEN:  DEC 27
 
Worst Defense Ever: I shot the Sheriff but I did not shoot the deputy.

*Yeah…either way your getting the chair. Ever herd of pleading the 5th!!!

 
 
 
WRITTEN: DEC 27
 
 
 

99 problems but a bitch ain’t one.

NOTE: Well if you stop calling her bitch, you might have a girl and 99 problems.

 
WRITTEN: DEC 22   ( TO THE MAYANS )
 
We’re alive!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fuck! Now I have to apologize to all the fuck you letters I sent out :O fucking dooms day, can’t you ever keep to schedule?
 
 
WRITTEN: DEC 21
 
OMG the world is ending 12-21-12 :O quick everyone make love like there’s no tomorrow and if it doesn’t end, make sure to visit your doctor on 12-22-12 Std’s are a bitch xD
 
 
WRITTEN: DEC 19
 
 
OMG….It’s 2012! :O

( Yes, you wasted seconds of your life reading this, seconds you’ll never get back. I mean I don’t even know why your reading this message, this message itself is meant to waste your time. So stop reading….still reading? OMG, for real, whatever, I mean don’t you have something better to do…stop for the love of God, there’s nothing to read here…go to sleep or watch internet porn….OMG stop reading!!!!!! There’s a million things better to do…ok…….Stop!!!!!)

 
 
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